The Three D's: Death, Destruction, And... Well, More Death!

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot kill. Courage to kill the things I cannot accept, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those who have angered me today




“It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Then hey, free eyeball!”




"Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door."




"Everyday I think the human race can't get any stupider. And everyday I'm proven horribly wrong."




"I hear voices and they don't like you."



"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving definitely isn't for you."


"Life gets better as you get older...unless you are a banana."

"A word to the wise isn’t necessary; it's the stupid ones that need advice."

"He who laughs last didn't get it."

"The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates."

"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."

"I am two with nature."


“Do I look fat in this?”- “No, your fat makes you look fat.”


“Darling, you have now been Knighted!”


“Get away…Your stupidity is contagious.”


“Fear me, for I shall bring the wrath of the Curry God down upon thee!”


"What have you got behind your back?"-"A spork."-"Why do you need a spork?"-"Uh...To spoon my...Pork?"


"There was once a cow upon a hill. It's not there now. It must have gone. That's it."


"This outfit has no practical uses in combat...What am I supposed to do? Beat people with my tit?" -Strikes pose- "Boob of Death! Hyaa!"


"Oh God we're related now. This loser syndrome is hereditary!" -sprays anti loser cream on self-


"I DISOWN THEE! TOTAL DISOWNAGE ON THEE!"


"The watermelon rind over there is our teammate...How dare you hit him?!"

Dating Strengths	Dating Weaknesses
1. Varied Interests - 71.4% 2. Adventurousness - 66.7% 3. Independence - 57.1% 4. Kindness - 54.5% 5. Spirituality - 53.8%	1. Selfishness - 72.7% 2. Shyness - 66.7% 3. Appearance - 66.7% 4. Financial Issues - 54.5%

Dating Strengths Explained
Varied Interests - You don't limit yourself, and that's a dating asset. Your varied interests make you available and interesting to a wider range of guys. Adventurousness - You are willing to try new things and be spontaneous. You want to get out there and really live, and you will attract people with a similar love of life. Independence - Your strong sense of independence comes in handy while dating. You are not held back or tied down; you are free to pursue your interests. Kindness - You treat other people with empathy and goodwill. This positive trait helps you stand out and draw people into your warmth. Spirituality - Your spiritual side brings you peace and balance, and keeps you grounded. This is attractive, as you can help reinforce this quality in other people.
Dating Weaknesses Explained
Selfishness - You think too much of yourself and your needs. You must learn to put your partner first and tend to his needs. Shyness - You know all too well the limits shyness places on you. Putting yourself out there in social situations may be difficult, but essential to your dating success. Appearance - Devoting a greater effort at making good first impressions is a must. Try to be fit and develop a style if you want to catch a guy's attention. Financial Issues - Your financial situation is not in good shape, and this does not bode well for you on the dating scene. Try to get on top of your financial difficulties.
Take the Dating Strengths and Weaknesses Quiz